Diary of a living legend

Monday, June 30, 2008



- "STAY INDOORS LADY, THERE ARE HELMET EATING EGYPTIANS ALOOF"

- "Hi there, we're from Meridian Energy... whereabouts is your fusebox?

- Narrator: "The man in charge at Jehovah's Witness Incorporated decided that it was finally time to lighten up on the strictness of dress code."

- Narrator: "Some of Gary Larson's earlier Far Side illustrations that never saw the light of day."

- Spot the difference, there are 10 differences to look out for.

- "Whether the cause be world peace or fighting against abortion, we run with Forrest Gump wherever it may lead"

- *crash* *stomp stomp* IS THIS LAKELAND FLORIDA? WHERE'S TODD??

- How many lightbulbs does it take to change an astronaut? Just one that has made Jesus the Lord the King and the Boss of its life.

- [Narrator: There are mechanics] "Boss, the woman's here for her car." "Uhh tell her it's $950 and if she doesn't flinch... say it's plus parts." [Narrator: Then, there's Hamilton Automative"] "Your car is ready, let me show you what we did." "Ohh, thanks!"

- "After flashing sirens and a loud megaphone command from the lady officer, Jeffrey and Jack stepped out of their lowered vehicle and proceeded to attempt walking in a straight line to prove that they were in fact, not intoxicated"

- End time prophecies.

- [The Lion the Witch and the Wardrobe out-takes] Edmund: "Lucy you knuckle head, you walked through the wrong wardrobe again."

- It's JAMIE GARRICK! I tell you, have proof*pulls cake tin out of pocket* wait whoops...mmmmm I'll have to get back to you.

- Actually scratch that, I think it's Johnny Depp passing off as a regular James Cringle.

- Cat Stevens has a pet hamster

- What if a big metal bomb fell out of the sky?

- I hold your constructive criticism in the highest regard.

- Snail mail? Gotta be pretty slim to fit in those envelopes though :(

- This is what life on mars really looks like: SICK!

- Today in Photoshop class, Harrietta learns to use the clone brush

- Arriving at the fiery chasms of Mt. Doom, Frodo and Sam frantically looked around for a place to discard their Orc suits

- There's a movie on tonight.

- Jase you are the sickest of the sickliest sick sicks in like, the universe.

- I can do a multi poly ring tone. like polyphonic (ABCs and stuff)

- If I was a dog what type of paintings would I hang in my house?? hahahahaha- and you guys beat me at posting. Like as in your posts came before mine. Because you posted first. Because you beat me.

- OK. Who's the cheeky monkey impersonating me!? THIS PLACE IS RIDDLED WITH IMPERSONATORS.

- "Don't worry, we weren't raptured either"

- What's the difference between saving, spending, and cows?

- I know who Jason is

- I know a joke

- your mom?

- Hey Weston... could you pray for my feet? They're flat.

- Post a shawl and win a knight in shining armor.

- Paul and Barnabas have another Damascus experience.

- Jack be nimble jack be quick, jack jumped off the roof.

- We have a few questions for you Mrs. Hasslehoff. Let's start with the most important... Where were you on september 11 2001?

- 8th photo down: I wanna be like Asher Bastion when I grow up

- The 9th photo on this page has a clue as to who suzy is in it. Hint, bottom left.

- I wonder if another world is possible where the word shawl was never invented

- I wonder if another world is possible where word verifications were never invented

- "Hi there madam, don't let global warming get you down... Join our life changing club today!"

- Captain Cook and his last remaining crew member breathe a sigh of relief as they discover land.

- It's Susan Pevensie!!

- I have a gun

- What Jane got in her Kinder surprise overwhelmed even her greatest expectations

- This movie is what dreams are made of - New York Times

- For everybodys interest. I am suzy.

- Ok... everyone stop copying me already! kthxbai

- Ok Suzy, I have a deal...you pay me money and I'll spend it.

- Jason you sick sick man.

- I think suzy is Brian Platt

- Hi, we are conducting an orchestra and are short of a basoon player and were just wondering...

- Hi, we are conducting a census and were wondering if you have a New Zealand citizenship?

- Hi, we were just in the neighbourhood and wondered if your satellite dish was picking up GOD TV

- "Hey sasha, I was just wondering... could you fill in for me on keys on sunday?"

- Excuse me madam, did you know that there's a light at the end of this tunnel?

- I think it's paisley jade. Posting that quick and being the first poster on most of these threads which mandrake starts. I win!

- Excuse me, we're looking for the next best thing.

- Ok now that you're both here, which of you can help me with my geometry?

- Studies show that 10 out of 10 people who walk on roof tops make leaky roofs.


- How do I get to flame? Does anyone know where this is held? Is there a cafe? Who does all the speaking? Why is it 7:00pm and not 7:08pm? Why are there so many people? Can I come if I'm muslim? Has anyone seen home alone 2?

- Remain calm people, Mr. Harris the firwarden will be here shortly. Until then everyone please line up in your classes.

- What the heck am I gonna wear tomorrow? (Nat)- Your corset? Or is Jamie still holding on to that one...

- Thank YOU for the shout symon. Yeah I think I'm keen to see it for the third time =D

- [One astronaut to another] ...'"That's rich coming from you dwarf! You and your people fought alongside this here white witch in the great battle"

- [Email] Fwd this picture to 5 friends and you will find true love within 3 days. This is not a hoax.

- Prince capsicum! Yaya it was the rocky road rocksorest movie. thanks sym

- Fiddler on the roof - modern remake.

- There was an englishman, an irishman and a maoriman...

- I can't wait to tell Jason how sick he is.

- Shrek and donkey off on another whirlwind adventure!

- Pre production begins on Narnia 3 - 'The Computer the Glitch and a Wastebasket"

- [One News Update] Osama Bin Laden takes a fresh approach on terrorism. For that story and more, join the Nightline Team at 11:30

- La lala lala, 30 minutes a day you got-ta push play.

- "We were just wondering... have you filed your Income Tax Return yet

- Legolas

- Annabel starts to get just a little nervous as Clyde Williams and Joe Calsis come to ask her a few questions about the death of her father, Richard Woods..

- Levin; Don't you put it in bread??

- You guys have gone crackers!
- A cone is formed with an arc length AB equal to 20 cm. As the cone is formed from a sector of a circle with angle 72 degrees, what is X?
- Is it Brad Avery??
No silly it's obviously Brad Pitt.
I love brad pitt! But I think it's Brad Carter... and the frenchies.
- I think it's cutting corners saying things like that, taking shortcuts, letting the team down. "Shortcut to what???" "MUSHROOMS!"

- If you were stuck in traffic with nothing but repeating radio songs and an old typewriter, what time would your 2 hour slow watch say?
- If you won a raffel using nothing but skill and brute force, would you listen to coldplay or kutless?
- I think Dr. Liz has lost her plot.. of land.. for the landfill.. in Ruatangata. Which is.. in transition.. in transformers.. in disguise. INDIGO.
- Mosquitoes prefer blondes to brunettes, blood type B to A, doctorates to diplomas, newspapers to magazines and toffee to chocolate. Fussy little guys aren't they!

- If you were stuck in a hole, would you
a) Climb out
b) Climb the corporate ladder
c) Live life loud

- Caleb and Joshua's good report of a land that flows with milk and honey falls onto deaf ears.

- Hi Margery, can you sponsor us for the 40 hour famine?

- Enjoying Everyday Life, with Joyce Meyer

- I can't wait to tell Jason how sick he is.

- I am in stitches, just like a leach

- Post a comment, win an anticlimax.

- Does anyone know CPR?

- [Shouts] "Remember our agreement guys, you're running a bit too darn fast for touch rugby at the moment!"

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